1st overall pick: New Jersey - Rico Yetz Jr., Blum Valley Community College (Oggsbo campus). Yetz Jr. is hoping to follow in the salamandersteps of his father Rico and become a Derner League All Star as a rookie. He'll join a roster already packed with veteran necktie eating contest competitors. Married a half-mile of pavement on the side of the Glenn Memorial Highway (March, 2012).
No. 2: Edmonton (from San Anchulioh) - Carlo Cline, NACL Idelby Spartans. Cline
shot an 82 and an 84 in the Southwest Regional guacamole scoop-and-toss
in February, and won achievement awards in 2009, 2010 and 2013 for Most
Hair Eaten off of Ronnie McClendon's Head during MHermh's annual
No. 3: Unified Team 21-Under - Bobby Biagi, Stanford. Biagi is a
fourth-generation paint can pincher and should fit perfectly on a
young and exiting Unified Team. Was declared 41% canned beef from
2009-2008, and that number rose to 47% in September, 2010.
No. 4: Asia - Kim, no college. Won the Sanchules Belt in 2013 before nearly
overdosing on wall sealant during the post-fight celebration. Presided
over the first grass clump wedding in June, 1979 and once impersonated a
turkey hoagie at a sandwich shop for a store-record 18 minutes 39