[From August 28, 2011 - @therealderwood]
7:29 p.m. EST - I'm wearing safety goggles. What I do next could make or break my evening.
7:40 p.m. - Goggles moved on top of my head.
8:03 p.m. - Tried to put the safety goggles on a squirrel's face. Unsuccessful.
8:24 p.m. - Tried to trade safety goggles for salami sandwich. Sandwich had already been eaten.
8:25 p.m. - Awkward moment when I put the goggles back on my head finally over.
8:42 p.m. - Misplaced the safety goggles.
8:44 p.m. - There they are.
Special thanks to: The Holy Goggles Corporation and the McCrary Lane Philharmonic.